A man is watching football. And then he falls asleep. The next morning his wife wakes him. "Honey, time to wake up," she says," its thirty to seven." "Really?" Says the man. "Whose winning?"
A dummy sits up in bed all night wondering where the sun has gone. The next morning, it dawned on him.
My friends say I never listen, or something like that.
Illiterate? Write for free help today!
Teachers say our futures depend on our dreams, but they don't let us sleep in class!
Did you hear about the kidnapping? Don't worry- he woke up.
Outside a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside a dog, its too dark to read.
What do you call cheese that's not your own? Nacho cheese!!
A teacher is taking the roll call. She points at a boy. "Are you chewing gum, young man?" "No, I'm (boy's name)." Replies the boy.
I put a dollar in the change machine. Nothing changed.
Hope you enjoyed these jokes! The credits for them are I Funny by James Patterson. Stay tuned for my next project!