My parents will NOT let me get a phone. How can I get one?

Question

Hi, I'm Noah, a 9-year-old boy living in Charlotte, NC. I am here because my parents will not let me get a phone. Even offering to pay for it 100%, they refuse to let me. I still do not know why. I've even asked for a literal Nokia 3310. They still say no. I use my computer an offal lot. That's because: I don't have an iPad. I don't have an iPod. I am stuck to all of the 2-year-old Elmo apps, and that rubbish. I had to reset my laptop even to open Microsoft Edge. I have asked them if I can use it with max restrictions. THEY STILL SAY NO. I also explained that it would be used for emergencies only, and they still refuse. Even if it's a car crash with my parents, they still will say no. Even if our school is on lockdown! STILL NO. I try and work myself down to a smartwatch. Still don't get anything with cellular connectivity. By now, they're saying, "Shut it, little #####!" This is getting more annoying than needed. I ask if we can start a hand-me-down process. Still no. And so now, this is getting overwhelming. I think, "why don't I just give up on this dumb process.." I have begged day and night for a phone. Even if it is one million years old. (that was a hyperbally sarcastic phrase.) I still am begging, I have given them a million reasons. "Mom, I won't do ...bad stuff, I'll use it in emergencies if at school, etc." It's still a no. They don't give a "fish." Thus I am much more angry than needed, due to not having one, even after 2 years straight of begging for one. I am not trying to be greedy or anything, but, we could at least work out a smartwatch deal. So I talk back to my mother. Me: "Mom, if you are able to spend £1,788 on your iPhone 13 Pro Max, then it mustn't be an issue for me to get a flippin'  £22 watch." 

Mom: "How dare you talk back to me! Now you don't get your computer until you get your driver's license."

Me: "Pardon me?"

Mom: (repeats herself)

Me: "Ohh... I get the moral now! Being a kid sucks!"

Mom: "No, that's not what I was trying to say-"

Me: "Act like it!"

And that's how it all went.

Comments

Hopefully this will help you feel better, because I'm 11 and don't have a phone!!!

---

Hey I didn't get my phone until I was in 8th but it was a flip phone and now 16 I have a Samsung A12 and it's the best you have to give it time

---

Same with me i'm 13 and still only have a flip phone nokia that my parents control !!!!!!!!!!

---

bro SAME. i am turning 13 really soon and have 2 big trips to go to and i dont have a computer, phone, even a smartwatch. its ok, we understand you. dont feel bad! :)

---

Look, I don't want to be mean or anything so hear me out.

I am better at tech than both my parents combined. Oh, what makes that even better is the fact that my mum runs customers and digital in the water company that provides to the entire south west of England. So yh, not to boast but I'm good at tech. So looking at this evidence I didn't get my first iPad till I was 9 and that was a school one so it doesn't really count cause I couldn't do anything  except you school work. I got my first proper iPad that I could do stuff on when I was ten and even then a lot of things like YouTube and social media where banned. Now I am twelve I got my first phone for Christmas after begging for years. I have wanted a phone since I was 5 because I'm just really passionate about tech.

My response to every time my mum said no was, 'can we talk about it'. We made a plan for all my tech and when I'd get it and she even allowed me to choose which phone. I got the Samsung A14 because she said I had to save half if I didn't want to get her old phone and yh, that's it. Another thing I'd recommend is to talk to your friends. I'm just saying. If 2 people in your class have a phone because their parents have divorced and their mum/dad live really far away than they have a phone for a specific purpose. If someone in your class has a phone because they have a medical problem than think of how it can help them. If someone in your class has to walk 15 mins to get home everyday when it gets dark than a phone is really just a good reassurance to their parents. Another thing is don't exagerate. I exaggerated with ear piercings and it turns out that my mum was going to get my ears pierced that summer but because I lied/all my friends lied about EVERYONE getting their ears pierced again, I got set back.

Weigh up the pros and cons like pick up or safety or an emergency. Make sure you think about how it benefits them as well as making sure it benefits you. But also don't think to heavily about how it benefits them because then they will just think you are skating over the bad parts. So yh, that is my advice for pursueding parents and also, I'm going to say this now. MORE KIDS IN YOUR CLASS DONT HAVE A PHONE THAN HAVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. Anyone who has a phone is going to want to show it of so it often feels like more people have a phone than actually have. It's quite annoying actually.

So yh, hope you listened

Girl online going offline

Ps.sorry my comment is so long

---

bro. just be a kid. go outside, play on the device you used to ask this question, bake, read, hang out with your friends/family, watch a movie or a show or something, play video games, play board games, etc. don’t worry about what people think of you. stay a kid for as long as you can, and try to make friends.

all because nobody gets a second chance to make new old friends. :) -luke bryan

---

your literally a child and your begging for a phone first you need to grow up into your teenager years and do nice things for your parents then mabye they would allow you. like what the hell your all kids and your worried about getting a phone. a phone is not all that you should just live your life live your childhood then start worrying when you are actually in the outside world. honestly you all need to grow up.

---

boiiiii i have three phone wait no... four lol

and they are all working!!!

---

at least I have a dad

---

I feel kids should get phones when they become teenagers. When I was around 13, I used to explore a lot with my friends and my parents constantly texted me on my phone to check in on me and make sure I was ok. The phone helped my parents with their anxiety.

---

same! im 12 and my parents are as toxic af they threaten and abuse me every day! one time, my parents beat me up so hard i bled so much! plus, i need the phone for literal school and they still dont let me! they also pretended to be me bc i gave my group members my moms phone number and she pretended to be me in the group chat! like ////! i  honestly just want to run away from home by this point.

---

Hey, I'm probably just like you..I keep asking for a phone and I still won't get one and I've been at this for years. But I've realized that it's ok to not have one. Even though everyone keeps showing off their iPhone 15s and their literally 13! ? But at least I have a friend that can help and build me up, like a true friend would. So now I know that phones can't even come close to match up to what really matters.

P.S my friend dosent have a phone either

---

Bro, All my friends have phones and i'm FREAKIN 12 ! YOUR 9. I don't even have a phone yet!

---

Its okay buddy. Im 17 and my parents won't let me buy a phone. Just be a kid as long as you can.

---

Yeah! Im 12 and the only kid in my class that doesn't have a phone!

PS- I only get to play games for 1 hour on Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays and only at four O'clock. My parents are dumb.

---

I didn’t get a phone until I was 13. I saved up to buy it, and I bought an IPhone XR. It’s the best for me rn. Start your own savings by asking your parents to sponsor a cashapp for you. Do chores and help out in return for money. Put it into your savings on cashapp and then save it for when your parents let you buy a phone.

---

Man you don’t even know bro

---

Also, cool Syd? I love how you presume that a) it's always the dad that leaves and b) that just because parents are divorced you can't see both. My parents have been divorced since I was 7, they are really good friends and I see my dad whenever I want

It does help that my dad found an apartment near where my mum lives but just please don't assume that because I said if their parents are divorced it means that one of the parents walked put

Girl online going offline

---

I have rly strict Asian parents who wont allow any screen time whatsoever (on school days) Even after I finish my hw! Plus I don't have an apple watch or phone and I'm not getting either until I'm in 9th grade (I'm in 6th at the moment). I don't know what to do abt the situation.

Also Idk if its just me but its so aggravating seeing kids younger than you who already have a phone!

---

Umm...They make you bleed? yk that's illegal right? Child abuse? Can someone get the cops for this girls?

---

WHAT? 17? BRO thats messed up

---

I'm 17 and still don't have my first phone

---

Same I’m 12 and this keeps happening. I even asked for an Apple Watch Series 6 and they still say no! If it makes you feel better, there are other people in your shoes.

---

Hi I actually have the same problem with my parents. But to be fair because of not having a phone I lashed out and figured my way into YouTube even with restrictions. But know I now why the don’t won’t me to see it. Despite being angry I realized that the reason they don’t want me exposed to that content is because they love me and they know the hidden dangers that a 11 year old can’t see. I quote my dad “ sometimes kids just can’t always see the bigger picture and that is what parents are for”. At first I didn’t know what he meant then when I looked at the YouTube stuff I actually saw content that traumatized me. Like I was already scared of bugs but I was getting over it then I saw a video and I was so scared that I still haven’t gotten over that fear. So just remember parents love you and you know that because they have always loved you even when you were just in a stomach they have always loved you and always will. And when their methods may seem rude it is all just to keep you safe. :)

---

im 16 and still dont have a phone. I've been left by friends at malls and other places with no possible way of contacting parents. it just feels unsafe to go anywhere without a phone at this point. i feel a bad person could see I don't have a phone and take advantage of that situation since they know I cannot get any help. i don't know how I'm going to even get a drivers license or start driving since I do not want to drive without a phone in case of emergency. i cannot imagine myself getting a job either since a lot of jobs require you to get an app of theirs or text your boss. I've had a lot of difficulties with school as well since we have had numerous assignments where we have needed a phone. sometimes we even have resources such as an online textbook and aren't provided with a real textbook and the only way to get the online textbook is by scanning a QR code. i think it is starting to get ridiculous and my mom is just being stubborn and holding onto her own beliefs. i used to have a phone, but it has been over a year. it made sense for me to not have a phone for a year due to my actions, however, I have learned very well since then and she knows this. i also can't imagine driving without being able to use a GPS or have that immediate safety device on me. she assumes I will text and drive however I am not like your average teenager even though I was a phone addict. i still know right from wrong and am able to control myself when genuinely needed. if I really wanted to talk to someone while driving, I could just call them and focus on the road. I've encountered many issues as well such as people giving me trouble at the gym I go to for not having the app and I explained that I don't have a phone and they held me from going for awhile and gave me a hard time. I've lost many friends as well since it can be difficult to maintain contact with me and I have 0 social life now. the friends I have had were too bothered by me using their phone to text my parents and all the difficulties they had to go through just to send me something. in this day and age we are involving, near everyone has a phone. we use ATMs which are digital and credit  cards which are also used digitally.  our world is evolving and at this point it feels that I am deprived of a basic freedom. i haven't left the house in a long time since if I am with a friend they might have to leave early and I am left alone. i am also scared of leaving the house without a phone as I don't know what could happen to me. i tend to draw in weird people for some reason and I know this. I've encountered many strange reactions in real life even at just a mall. i cannot imagine if I was left alone with an odd person and I had no way of contacting anyone. once even I was at my cousins party and there was a father there who was following me around and kept talking to me and flirting with me and was being very creepy. i could not contact my parents or anything and I felt very stressed due to this. many people I have told about my parents not letting me get a phone to think that my parents don't care about me or are crazy. I've mentioned everything that I have just mentioned to my parents but they still don't budge. my parents find every excuse in the book. i am unable to even submit any math homework and have had many troubles with grades due to this. I have good grades now, but every time I get zeros and have to have long talks with teachers for them to give me full points. each time I get a new teacher I have to explain my situation as well and they all look at me a bit strangely. this was fastly typed and sort of a rant so due to that this was not written very well, just to let everyone get an idea of it. I forgot to add but I also have a laptop and I can do a lot of things that a phone can do except use messages or take it places so it does not make sense.

Answer 1

Why do you need one? And asking for a phone at seven years is absurd. It shows you what the world had turned into.

Hey, I'm about 15 now, and I still haven't got a phone. I don't want one, anyhow. Stop being spoiled, that's my advice.

Comments

He's 9 and that's is really sad I'm sorry! I have a 14 yr old friend that doesn't have one.

---

Besides that, you can't even spell. No, I wouldn't give anyone a phone if they can't even spell basic words like "awful," either.

---

Hey, I don't spell very well. Just because you might not be the greatest in some areas like communication or spelling does not mean you shouldn't get something. You should base it on whether or not your responsible and will use it for the right things.

---

Why are u so rude leave the kid alone

Answer 2

I get it. I am 11 and the same thing happens except I want an Nintendo Switch for $300. They are thinking of getting a remodel of a C64 thats like 2,000 and it works like garbage. I feel that if you want to get a phone you’ll have to like, do something amazing for them like get all As or something like that.

Answer 3

Prove you can handle one.

Comments

I have not got a phone so I will work hard for it

Answer 4

well at least you're not an eleven year old like me, with no personal laptop (the one i have is like 7 years old and i dont even have the password!), no phone, no smartwatch (or even a normal watch!) and no tablet or ipad. at least you have a computer that you have the password to!

Comments

I don't have the password to my dad's computer, either. I do have a computer, but it's as old as I am, and you'd honestly be better off using a quill and ink on a roll of paper than trying to get it work. I have to be super sneaky to use any internet at all.

Answer 5

Oof. I’m also 9, but I feel really bad for you. ELMO APPS?! Hey, I have a 2 year-old little sister, thanks for the idea lol. Anyways, I seriously don’t know what your parent are up to. Maybe you could ask why they won’t give you a phone (if your parents won’t give you a phone even for emergencies, I seriously don’t know what your parents are up to.).

Comments

Because at that age I (now 13) was playing with barbies. I wasn't going out on my own. Heck I wasn't even allowed to walk to my dad's house on my own. It's a 6 min walk. If there is an emergency at school than the school has a phone. Teachers have phones. YOU DONT NEED A PHONE AT THAY AGE.

girl online going offline

Answer 6

Just listen to your parents

Comments

not exactly the easiest :/

---

Yooh...

Just maybe if you have roblox just make a game and it will make you robux, then make it into money, or sell stuff!!!IDK