Questioning..

Question

So I am 12 but I kind of know I am Pansexual (at least that's what im calling myself right now). I don't really have a preference but if i had to choose I would prefer girls.

Anyway, I already came out to my dad and he supports but he thought I was too immature to know my sexuality at such a 'young' age, but I've known since I was 10 and the only person I've been able to tell was my friend. My mom also knows and she supports but I know deep down she also thinks its just another one of my weird phases.

So yeah I've only really been able to tell my friends. In the beginning I thought I was lesbian because I had a crush on this girl in my class. We became really good friends and I eventually told her I liked her, which is when she told me that she was actually a Trans Masc and used he\they pronouns now. I was very happy for him but it made me question myself again, and when I did more research I found out I was Pan. I was very happy about it.

Then he (I will call him Jay for privacy reasons) started crushing on this girl named Abby. I was so jealous because we had "dated" for a few months until he just broke up with me one day. I had actually seen it coming though, since he hadn't been himself. I was heartbroken, because I am Aroace and have difficulty expressing feelings. I had never liked anyone before besides him.

We stayed friends though and he started chasing Abby. Naturally I was happy that he was finally in love with someone but I still liked him and I felt very awkward around her.

Then my other friend Kate, who I am kind of friend-aquaintance with, told me that her ad Abby had been chatting and Abby told her that she didn't actually like Jay, and that he made her uncomfortable. I was surprised because Abby had been holding Jays hand everywhere and acting all romantic and I thought she liked Jay back but I guess not. I didn't know how to tell Jay though cause naturally he was one of my closest friends and it was really hard but eventually I just broke and told him. He though I was joking at first but a few weeks later Abby confirmed it and apologized to Jay.

Idk what to do, because I like Jay and Abby knows that but I know he doesn't have feelings for me anymore.

I also don't know my gender identity. My assigned birth gender is Female btw. I feel like a Trans Masc but also Non Binary and also Female at the same time. I also feel like none of them but all of them. It's a weird feeling. right now I am using He\She\They pronouns until I figure it out. Im sorry this was so long but does anyone have any advice?? (im sorry if this seems way too dramatic and weird btw, because it fully is haha)

Answer 1

Okay, so the pansexual thing is definitely me. And I get it- you’re calling yourself pan but wondering if your bi, poly, etc… but if I were you, I’d start pulling up pictures of all the gender identities and think to yourself if they are cute. No, really though, that’s how I decided I liked drag queens too lol

The gender identity… you sound gender-fluid. If you feel masculine, feminine, both and neither, you probably shouldn’t jump to conclusions though. That does kind of define gender-fluid- and often they do use “he/she/they” pronouns as well, but you still have a while to figure it out. You have 6 years until your an adult. Even more years ahead to still question. Don’t start jumping to conclusions quite yet

So just know that the rest of us are here for you when you need it! ♡

Comments

It's true. We're all here for you. @aNoNyMoUs, I agree.

Answer 2

Take it sliw.

You're never too young to find out your sexuality

Comments

I agree.

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Agreed.

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agree

Answer 3

I can't tell you your gender or sexuality. But you just need to take it slow to figure everything out. You don't need to know who you are overnight. It takes some time.

Answer 4

I think you’re a gender-fluid trigender person.

About the other stuff, I don’t have anything…